Becoming “antifragile” and what that means.
Finn has no idea. She has no idea what will test her, rattle her, push her, make her believe she can't. Finn is my daughter and this past Sunday, on Mother's Day, I couldn't help but think what was ahead for her because, really, she doesn't know. And, frankly, neither do I. Neither do you
At 11 years old, she thinks life is a series of rocks to elegantly and gleefully skip across as she navigates her own river of life. She has no idea that those rocks will become harder to find, harder to get to, slippery AF, and she'll fall off and bang her shins, break wrists and ankles, maybe more.
She has no idea that life will feel really hard—a lot—as she wins and loses friendships, jobs, tests, romances, bids on houses and RFPs, arguments with her spouse and kids, races, clients and her own internal emotional landscape.
But what she also doesn't know is that those body-mangling falls, the trips that break break bones and beliefs, the frustrations that boil her blood and make her so stomach-wrenchingly mad, and the failures she was 100% confident were going to pan out are what will give her the fortitude to not only withstand, but actually pilot, what comes next with an increasingly daft set of maneuvering skills.
Nassim Nicholas Taleb calls people who have learned from their fractured challenges “antifragile" because they actually grow from disorder, and can withstand the shocks and aftershocks of what life throws at them. Taleb says, “Difficulty is what wakes up the genius.”
So, like Finn, you may not know yet, that the sh** you complain about now, will become the dripping wet gifts of your story, of your past. They will become you, part of you, saturating your cells with perspective, wisdom and a deep care and respect for the stories other people live.
And that, First name / my friend, is what you need to find, and share. That is gold. That is what people will look to you for as a leader, thought leader, people leader, audience leader, and leader of your own narrative out in the world.
I don't want Finn to suffer—as her mom, her pain is genetically and energetically connected to my moments, hours, days, and all of time. But I also want her to feel the spine-tingling nuances of life that will make her antifragile.
That is what I hope for her, and it's what I hope for you. Because having a robust story will position you as someone with impact, and leave a legacy.
Get in touch if you need help. I'm here to support you, and help you dig down deep for that antifragile piece of you waiting to show it's face.
xo, Lindsay
